"71% of Black Women are Unmarried with Children"

While I soo love Oprah, I found last Friday's show very interesting. I agree with Oprah that on some levels being and staying single is an evolution. Where as earlier in the day, black women (women in general) strived to finish high school, grow up, and have children and get married! I don't see anything wrong with that. Oprah also made a point to say that "Women often time lose themselves" When they get married.

I agree that in some instances women do lose themselves and their identity when engaged in a relationship or married. However I don't use that as a reason as why I am presently single.

I am single because I choose to be. I am headed towards marriage, but I chose not to marry earlier on, because I was not emotionally, or mentally ready to sustain a healthy marriage or "attract" a healthy partner. I took time off to work on myself so that I could be an example and attract the kind of partner I wanted and "be the kind of partner I wanted" I have to BE THAT!, so having said that, I guess I was troubled when Oprah stated that 71% of Black women are not married. I am sorry but to me that seems like more of an epidemic! Especially where children are concerned! It's in our community! I don't think it should be praised. There was complaint that there are a number of in-eligible black men, and that black women should basically start looking outside the box. That personally bothers me, because I see on some levels that being true. More and more black women and men are not married. I look back in the 60's only 40 years ago! Black couples was celebrated it was a norm, then the 70's, pimping, ho-ing, all the blaxploitation movies, highligting and pimping and drugs, everything they fought so hard to stop from "other races" in the 60's pretty much went down the tubes. Please don't get me wrong, I love "Superfly, The Mack, Foxxy Brown, Cleopatra Jones" but stay with me here. I am just trying to figure out simply "what happened" to our "community" and the way "Black Men and Women" interact.

I really try to work with my son Samuel to help him be a "healthy" "marriageable" young man, should he choose to marry. I don't think there is anything wrong with black women marrying outside of their race. As some would say Love does not have a face. But I just raise the question what is happening with our homes and the way men and women particularly "black men and women"?